The "P" Word

I have a sweet little voice studio in my home, and I never thought I’d like teaching but I have some really great kids and adults that I really like to work with, so here I am.  Over the past couple of weeks, two of my students have had amazing breakthroughs, seemingly out of nowhere. I certainly wasn’t expecting it, and definitely not from either of them. Each of their individual breakthroughs took me by surprise, because they are not my “best” singers. However, these two students are among my best prepared, the ones who work outside of our weekly lessons the most.  The progress they have made has really impressed me and also gives me a first row seat to what happens when people actually PRACTICE and put the time and work in.

Oh, how I hate to practice. And I mean LOATHE with all of my being. It is lonely, sad, and oftentimes boring way to pass the time, and absolutely essential to any kind of progress. (Insert expletive) I also don’t like to practice because it sometimes takes months for me to see any progress, and what I sound like compared to where I want to be is so far away that it seems impossible and pointless to stay the course.  I am sure I am not the only one on the planet who deals with this aversion, in fact I think in some way or other all of us do.  But sooner or later we also all realize that it is the only way to improve. It is the ONLY way to improve. Even if it sounds like (insert expletive). As Julia Cameron states “ It is impossible to look (or sound!) good  and get better at the same time.” 

Singing has its own unique challenges; one of the main ones being what you sound like in your head is not the same thing that everyone else hears. In order to get better, you have to develop other feedback systems that help you gauge whether or not you are on the right track. I often feel like a deaf person when I sing, making sounds that I cannot and will not ever hear the way others will hear them and having to trust the techniques I’ve learned and developed over the years to produce the sound I want. (still working on this) Recording helps, but it takes a lot of inner strength to be able to listen to a recording of yourself without surviving the following I’m-giving-it all-up-what-was-I-thinking! drama, often lasting for weeks.

But even with the deaf issue and the rest of the long list of challenges singing presents, consistent practice does make singing easier and eventually sound better.

Regarding practice, last week I had a moment of strong resolve, which was quickly challenged. The following conversation took place in my head:

Hopeful Me: “This is it, Liz- you are going to practice every day for an hour, first thing in the morning. We are going to become that consistent singer we’ve been trying to be for so long. This is the year!"

 Cynical Me: “Yeah, yeah, we’ve heard it before. You last about a week and then you don’t sing for weeks.”  

Hopeful Me “ I know!!! What can I do to really make it stick this time?!?  I’ve been going through this pattern for years, and I need to break free! Its time to get serious! I mean it!! Lets set an attainable goal: one hour a day, four days this week- that sounds doable."

Cynical Me: “But how will you fit it in? There are too many other things to do, you are already overwhelmed as it is, and you want to add this? The time has passed for you to be a singer, and what if you are kidding yourself that you will ever be any good? Maybe its time to quit, Hopeful Me. Its too painful.”

H.M.: “Well, yeah, maybe you are right. But….perhaps the point isn’t to be a really good singer. What if it’s just to have something I can work on that no one can take away from me. Let’s experiment and see what happens if I put in the work on a really consistent basis. ”

C.M. “You’ll be sad and lonely.”

H.M. “I’m sad and lonely now, so what’s the difference?”

C.M. “Well, you don’t stick to things”

H.M. “Um, how long have I taken lessons? 20 years? I do too stick to things, meanie.”

C.M. “Well, that should tell you something. If you haven’t become a better singer by now, you never will”

And so on and so forth. H.M. finally set up the goal that I was going to practice for one hour a day, four days in the week. And, amazingly enough, I did it. (take that, meanie.) I did my best to not judge how it sounded, I just sang, just PRACTICED, it was a modern day miracle. And sure enough, yesterday I had a mini breakthrough of my own. One of the songs I practiced every day this week was a coloratura aria I had an accompaniment track to, so I ended up really working out my high voice, which is where most of the frustrations lie (soprano friends, ammiright?)

The breakthrough happened yesterday in church.  I was sitting there singing a hymn that always has me straining to reach the higher notes, but to my surprise, the notes just came out without me really doing anything. It was easy, and singing is never easy for me, ever. Never ever, ever, ever, ever ever.  Even when it’s a hymn in church or when I'm home alone and nothing is at stake. 

Moral of the blog post: Practice makes better and easier,  and better is better than sucky and hard. Even if its not perfect. I am at the point that I will take it. And at the very least, it creates less work in the long run.

So, Hopeful Me is going to keep it going this week, she already got me to practice today. I always thought she was the Me who was lying, but I am beginning to suspect it’s that other guy. 

With that, I would love to hear your practice success stories. How have you found ways to practice that are sustainable over a long period of time?  When in your life have you seen practice pay off in unexpected or expected and happy ways?  I would love to hear them, if you feel like sharing with the class.